Nobody Lives the Way You Think They Do

“Few things are more fascinating than the opportunity to see how other people live during their private hours.” – Diana Vreeland


Well, ain’t that the truth?!

How many times have you walked by a house and wondered, “What’s it like inside?”

And by “what’s it like” you mean– not only what does it look like, but what are the people’s lives like? Who could afford that?! Or, how can they live in such filth?!

As a society, we are obsessed with seeing how people live– from old-school Robin Leaches’ “Lifestyle of the Rich and Famous” to anything that is on the HGTV channel. We devour glossy design magazines, curated Instagram photos, and lusciously photographed interior design books.

The thing about these TV shows and social media is that they don’t really show how people live.


Are these people happy? Do they have good health? Financial problems? Thriving relationships? Positive mindsets? OR, are they a hot mess and hope that no one will be able to see it?


So much of our lives are now public, due to social media. We can curate what people see with perfectly positioned photos and descriptions from our highlight reel.

“Check out this delicious dinner I had while visiting the Amalfi Coast!”

Note: It’s the first time they’ve ever left the country and taken a real vacation, but the photo makes it look like they’re a sophisticated seasoned traveler who always eats Pasta al nero di sepia. Don’t know what that is? No worries. They have no idea what they ordered either.

We invite so many strangers into our curated lives and yet we rarely let people into our real lives. And by real lives, I mean our homes.


[Tweet “We invite so many strangers into our curated lives and yet we rarely let people into our real lives. And by real lives, I mean our homes.”]


When was the last time you had friends over?


Can’t remember? Not surprising.

If you did have people over, did you spend hours cleaning and hiding things you didn’t want people to see, in fear they might judge you for how you live?

It’s ok. You’re not the only one.

In fact, pretty much every single client I have ever had in my life – from when I designed interiors to now 1-on-1 coaching – feels this way and has done this. It doesn’t matter if the home is worth $14 million or is a $500 per month apartment rental. Money has nothing to do with it. (Although, it can certainly make it easier to hide this!)


What we all have in common is that we have a perception of what we think our lives should be like, which is usually very different than what we currently experience.


As I write in CLEAR: How to Simplify Your Life & Live More Fearlessly, your environment is a reflection of your inner self.

We spend a lot of energy hiding who we are and where we are at in life. This comes from the feeling that we are not good enough. We feel like failures because we aren’t living the life we think we should be living.

The toll this takes is in our health, relationships, spirituality, finances, and in our homes.

We cut ourselves off from friends and family. We deal with high anxiety and little joy. We overeat and drink too much. We spend money we don’t have. We don’t do the things we love to do. We live in a constant state of fear.

What is so crazy about this is –


Who defines how YOU should live?


When we peek into the beautiful homes, we create stories about what the people should be like that live there and what their experience of life is like.

The truth is, you have no idea what their life is like. I can guarantee it is nothing like the story you created for them. And, how they live has nothing to do with you and your life.

So, I want to know-


Do you hide the way you currently live?

How do you want to live?

What would it take to create that life?


These aren’t easy questions to answer.

A lot of times, we don’t know what we want or need. We get caught in our own labyrinth of shoulds.

You don’t have to do this alone.

It would be my pleasure to be a part of this process with you because I know how important it is to answer these questions and to figure out how you want to live.

Once you know this, it becomes easier to make decisions to fearlessly move forward in creating the life you want.

I would like to invite you into a Get CLEAR™ Strategy session where we work through this together.

The 30 minute session is free. You can book your session HERE.

I hope you take me up on this offer for a million reasons. But the biggest reason is-


Life is way too short to live it and feel stagnant, miserable, and hating on yourself.


So, I invite you today to take the first fearless step and book your Get CLEAR™ Strategy Session.


I look forward to meeting you!


If you liked this post, please share and join the CLEAR™ Inner Circle above where you will receive weekly musings on wellness, leadership, and design!

A bientôt,